Friday, January 27, 2012

Can someone help elaborate my thesis statement?

I would like to write my research paper on the effects of overpopulation in poor countries like India. So here is my thesis statement: overpopulation growth is the results of problems facing poor countries such as hunger, poverty, and environmental destruction. Can someone tell if this is a good thesis statement or can someone give some advice on how can I better my thesis statement. Or any advice at all of my thesis statement.Can someone help elaborate my thesis statement?No!!! Don't use that statement!



It's not true. Carefully read what you wrote. Overpopulation is NOT a result of those problems. Those problems are a result of overpopulation. I can help you more but I have a problem in the lab here. I'll write back in a few.Can someone help elaborate my thesis statement?it sounds pretty good, yet overpopulation is not the result which is how your wording is making it sound so make it say that overpopulation is the cause of problems...Can someone help elaborate my thesis statement?That is truly a piss-poor thesis statement for a University class. You don't even know which way you're trying to argue the statement. First you state you want to write on effects of overpopulation, then in your thesis you are listing the problems as CAUSES of the overpopulation. Seriously, look at what you've written here, you can't argue it both ways at the same time but you might be able to formulate a more original statement from this whole mess. That is, that overpopulation, poverty, lack of education and environmental destruction reinforce each other in a never-ending downward spiral for the counties in question. There.Can someone help elaborate my thesis statement?
Its sounds pretty good as is, but if you wanted to change it up a bit you could probably rephrase a little by saying "Problems facing poor countries such as hunger, poverty, and environmental destruction are a result of overpopulation growth." or something like that....

1 comment:

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